'Innocence'
timothy r gates, 10/04/2014
Innocence
robbed,
love deceived.
I awoke as dead,
love smothered,
innocence stolen.
Love baptized
the pillage of
memory's harm.
Anesti! Risen!
Smiling,
we stroll,
innocence and I.
Mnesia,
people die,
i know.
such things happen.
"Death, where is thy sting?"
harps, some people's
ethereal euphemisms
for laicised angels.
Funny, some nights,
dreaming
i remember those gone,
in their blessed repose.
Singing "Memory Eternal"
in Russian and English.
in Greek, i see them all,
chanting " μνμη..."
Funny, a bit of Hebrew,
used to know it better,
still dreaming,
chanting
a "Kaddsh,"
in step with
a chant from "The Book of the dead."
Funny, at times,
"sitting,"
these gone,
they seem to call,
and i find myself beholding
their faces.
Funny, fact and fiction
are eclipsed,
bottled tears flow,
i awake with wet cheeks,
happy and glad
that they are still alive
in my dreams
'Laughing'
timothy r gates, 10/08/2014
Laughing,
not outside empathy,
contemplating innocents,
not given freewill by any
measure.
Warriors
weeping,
not alone,
yet alone,
wondering what it might be like,
"when will my cheeks dry?"
Laughing,
a divine comedy,
yet acted by egos,
not giving, even, Jesus, a
chance.
Children
playing,
games not real,
yet real to them,
no matter the stage set,
giggles need no prompting.
Praying and
laughing,
metaphors,
gasping and guessing,
heaven's hell's
euphemism.
Ha. Ha. Ha.
Funny.
'Incarnation'
timothy r gates, 10/17/2014
Divine,
human.
incarnation,
humans being divine,
without the
imprecatory prayers.
Emanations come, go,
the incarnation remains,
when people are human,
without missing the divine -
the faceless beheld.
Seeing.
'I'd drink a
Beer'
timothy r gates, 10/19/2014
I'd drink a
beer,
never drank just one,
remembering your love,
guiding, sometimes misguided -
damn, i don't drink,
well, alcohol.
so i'll weep,
sad, yet happy tears,
filling the ethereal bottle.
In another day,
psalmist's chants hushed,
sharing a glass
from a bottle once filled,
without a word uttered,
all is said.
And, it's sufficient.
'Daddy
said'
timothy r gates, 10/28/2014
left alone,
after broken in the garden,
"Father,"
you were silent.
Daddy said,
"you're too big to call me that,"
i was silent.
praying,
in that closet,
"please, stop preying."
"Fear not,"
words, worthless,
when you're afraid.
then the prodigal Lord,
prays,
"forgive me."
dad, now, hugs and kisses,
whispering,
"I love you, son."
Screw that garden.
'Praying'
timothy r gates, 10/29/2014
i prayed.
" please make it stop."
it did in eleven years.
little children know,
you want what you want,
sometimes you get it,
sometimes you don't.
their questions need no answers,
only affirmation of them -
and we don't know, either.
i don't trust those praying,
not being honest about unanswered
needs of millions of people.
i don't trust those not praying,
claiming to know
what you may, or may not.
bottled tears,
baptize
the little girl, little boy,
praying without knowing,
waiting for that hand
only to wipe away sadness,
saying, "I think it's time to play."
Playing with Grandpa was just the best.
'Sometimes,
maybe, i get
it'
timothy r gates,.10/30/2014
my children
still say,
"i love you daddy,"
every day, yes each one.
i am still able to
hear this.
the sun rises.
and sets,
still can see
the moon,
and the celestial expanse.
still able to hear,
and see,
raindrops falling.
i still am able
to feel them.
in between my words,
in between the spaces,
in between the pauses,
sometimes I still hear the silence.
sometimes, maybe, i get it.
"I remember you
daily"
timothy r gates, 11/04/2014
Grandfather,
You made me feel great, always, no matter what.
Uncle,
you supported my college choice when most didn't.
Mother,
Her guileless observations, and honest responses when I was a boy.
"I remember you often"
Grandmother,
You were the best, taking me to speech therapy every Saturday.
"Mother of my oldest two children"
When I look into my oldest children's eyes, I remember.
"Anna Choma"
At your funeral, first time I sang "Memory Eternal," a blessed
repose.
"More relatives, friends, close and not so close people"
I am who and what I am through you. Nothing is through a vacuum.
"I remember"
Funny, not one do I remember in sadness. I still do find a tear, or more, here
and there, yet also smiles. Their lives still help give me life.
Grateful. Love. Memory Eternal
